so i just got back from ireland. wow. words i never thought i'd say... or type for that matter. it was famazing (which is fuck and amazing... together). Mo and i met some of the most hilarious, insane, awesomely disgusting people i've ever met in my life. they were perfect in every way. as Hannah said, "these boys are us... only boys..." - it was so true.
we spent time with Jay's family in county Kerry. they were all wonderfully delightful, and, with the exception of the pudding (fried blood), the food was delicious. we drove around the countryside. spent some time in Dingle - utterly beautiful little town with friendly people and chowder! we went to the Cliffs of Moher where i personally did a lot of thinking about my life in general. we went to the night clubs and pubs and danced all night. drank a giant pitcher of sex on the beach by myself and got protected by one Brendan Moroney from the scary irish creepers. hung out at '717' and watched Family Guy with the lads.
if i hadn't gotten ill, i would've never wanted to leave. those boys are like family now. utterly amazing in every way. and i miss Hannah more and more. thankfully she and Jay are coming to Wisconsin in a few weeks. phew.
i don't know why i'm writing on here. no one reads this blog and i've never really shown it to anyone. for some reason i feel like i'm talking to you and i miss talking to you so much. when i was in Ireland, i felt like you were all around me, which makes a lot of sense but it always put this... gloom into my thoughts. a tainted feeling almost. why? why am i still bothered by this? i've been faced with much more difficult things in my life but this is just stuck in my head. bouncing around from the darkest corners of my mind, filling me with doubt and regret and driving my sanity out the window.
i don't want to burden people around me by talking to them about this so i'll send this message out into the lonely void that is cyberspace.......
now what?
